I feel like i've been on a pendulum of emotions and commitment these last few weeks. I went from being fully committed and back in the zone to falling off the wagon to back in the zone to having one of the worst weeks I've had in a long time. I feel like I was possessed by the old me. I just gave in to temptation after temptation this week. I'm not mad, im not angry, i'm disappointed in myself, but it is what it is and i'm moving on from it. For the first time in a long time I gained weight this week, and it's my own fault. I own it, and I have to just work hard this week to get back on track. All I can say is that at least I didn't allow this to get me completely off track.
Honestly I know that to be successful with weight loss I need to work like a star with all 5 points working together: food, exercise, water, determination and drive with consistency in the center of all of that. The weeks that I do all of these things and am consistent with them I lose weight, the weeks I do not - like this week - the star falls apart and the results are either maintain or gain depending on how many points are not there.
So what went wrong? Well as a "thank you" at work employees were given the option to purchase each other Purdey's chocolate bars. I was given four chocolate bars. They were sitting on my desk and I thought to myself, i'm not going to eat these, i'm focused. Then I thought, oh i'll have one piece, well one piece turned into the whole bar, and that turned into a whole bar every single day for four days. Then it was our annual BBQ, no whole wheat buns, just bad horrible no good very bad food, and I ate it. I felt like crap after, but I ate it because I didn't want to sit there with all my colleagues and not "participate". Then it was another BBQ, then it was alcohol, it was just temptation after temptation and I did not demonstrate strength at all. I just wanted to be part of the group, and what resulted is a crumbling star.
what did I learn? #1 Prepare myself better for the work functions. #2 GIVE AWAY THE CHOCOLATE right away - no option. #3 Move on and do better next time. Like I said before, i'm not mad - it happened, im just disappointed in my choices but I can only move on from here.
There was some positive that came from this week though. I had such an amazing time playing in the Slo Pitch tournament on Friday. Our team came in 2nd, we played 5 games from 8AM-4PM and I only sat one inning. They even awarded me shared MVP on the team with another kick ass girl, Jen Shaw. Playing just makes me happy and I don't want it to end :)
Today we also did our Amazing Race challenge in Biggest Winners, lots of fun with two teams. A little competition definitely makes you work harder. Everyone did awesome, Orange & Raspberry came in first and Pink & Blue came in second. I was pink. But I think all the BWs are winners regardless of what team they are on, and NO im not saying that because our team didn't win LOL. Seriously - everyone kicked some serious ass today. Looking forward to our wrap up and climbing Finlayson.
So here is my oath for this week: "I promise to be on track with my food, to attend all my workouts, to be committed and focused and to not give into temptation"
“The consequences of today are determined by the actions of the past. To change your future, alter your decisions today.”