I've had this shift in attitude the last few weeks, and just realized what it is. I'm starting to feel normal, feel like I don't stand out anymore. I can't really pin point what exactly it was that made this shift, but i'm happy that i'm getting to that place. I still have moments of feeling out of place but those moments are becoming fewer and further between.
The TC10K was this past Sunday. My goal was to do it in 1:05 which was faster than my best time of 1:08 so I thought that was a pretty good goal to reach for. I SMASHED that goal - I completed it in 1:01! I could hardly believe it when I saw the time. I was running and had what I think people refer to as a "runner's high". I felt like I was having an out of body experience and even though my muscles were screaming at me my head kept saying "keep going keep going keep going". I was passing people, I was passing people who I look at and think that they should be able to run this thing no problem. After I crossed the finish line I almost felt like I was going to collapse, my legs didn't want to work anymore, I had pushed myself beyond my limits which is a good thing. I am proud of myself and now i'm just excited for the next race which is Oak Bay Kool 1/2 Marathon Relay next weekend.
Another exciting new limit I reached was starting slo pitch. I played as a kid and loved it but have been held back as an adult in playing due to my weight. Myself and my friend Tonia joined my work team and last Monday was our first game, with no practice may I add LOL. I was nervous about disappointing my team, I was nervous that I wasn't going to be good enough. Well let's just say I definitely need some practice with getting my throwing arm back, but I was so happy to find out that every single person on that team was just there to have fun, they didn't care that I didn't play perfectly, or that I didn't get on base, it was all about having fun. This was even Tonia's first time playing any form of baseball and she rocked it as our pitcher!! I was playing the game, freezing cold, but was just literally beaming with happiness. I can't even explain the feeling, it's like you come from a place where you think you will never feel happy again to feeling normal.
So the next new limit is starting soccer in a few weeks and i'm not scared at all. I love being able to mix up all my ways of staying active, it keeps things interesting. Warmer weather will be coming which will mean hiking again and biking. All I can say is BRING IT ON and remember..."Never give up on a dream just because of the length of time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway."