Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Celebrating Success

Well i'm back from our trip to Texas. Everything's big in Texas for sure. I was pretty scared going on this trip as I would be totally out of my element and little control over my meals since they are all provided by the conference apart from dinner. I was delighted to see that they offered a great breakfast selection that was not just muffins and coffee. There was actually eggs and fruit. I was able to choose the foods that were healthy and just avoided the breads and the deep fried foods and the desserts. It definitely wasn't easy seeing all that food and avoiding it but I did it and I am proud of myself for it.

I did go down there with a huge intention of working out every day but that just did not happen. It took me almost four days to recover from our 29 hours travel extravaganza. 9 hours of delays in the Victoria airport and 9 hours in the Seattle airport. I don't wish to relive that. I did utilize my time in Seattle to run the stairs at the airport, got a nice shine on but really what else am I going to do for 9 hours?

I'm happy to be back in my bootcamp routine though, well until Friday at least and then it's time to get the rest of my wisdom teeth out... not looking forward to that. Once that is done and over with I will be able to focus 100% back into working out 6 days per week..

Today I had an amazing meeting with a life coach who asked to interview me about my weight loss journey. It's a big awakening to re-live the past 2.5 years and vocalize how I got here. It really made me step back and look at myself and say WOW look at what you've done. That is still my hardest part is recognizing my successes but i'm getting better at it. This whole journey is really about self discovery and learning about who I am. It is not just a physical journey but a mental and emotional journey as well. All these elements must work together in harmony to bring you success.

My focus now is to remember to celebrate, remember to be proud of myself and remember all that I have accomplished.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

My new LuLu's

I'm feeling much better this week. My mouth isn't as sore and it seems like i've avoided getting dry socket. I'm back on my game!

Friday was our work night out to say goodbye to those of us transitioning to CRA. It was a fun night and nice to see so many people out. It was also a little sad knowing i'm going to have to leave these great group of people. I'm so happy that i'm going with some friends, but sad i'm leaving some behind. It's been a pretty long and frustrating process ever since we found out about HST, but it's all finally coming to an end and i'm ready for a new beginning and a new career path at CRA. I have to admit though i'm pretty scared though..It takes me a long time to get comfortable with people and build relationships and I've finally done that where I am now.. But I'll embrace this challenge just like I do everything in life and strive for my best.

Saturday it was BDHQ's customer appreciation event which was an outdoor Songhees workout and then a sale at the new Pen Run store on Yates. Funds are a bit tight right now with our upcoming trip so no new shoes for me at Pen Run, but we did go to Sports Check and got the buy one get one 50% off sale so both John and I could get shoes.

Today was Biggest Winners, weigh in and goal setting. I'm down a few more pounds and also more body fat which is awesome! My goal for this session is to lose 26 lbs, that will make me < 200 lbs which is a huge goal for me. My prize for winning the last session was a pair of lulu capri's & a tank. I went shopping with Michelle after boot camp today and found a really cute outfit that i'm excited about so I have some new workout clothes which I definitely needed! What i'm even more excited about is the fact that I can actually wear them and feel good about it. I can go shopping with my friends now and "normal" stores and not be intimidated or embarrassed. I couldn't even do that in high school!

Tuesday AM we leave for Texas for World Burn. I'm excited but also slightly nervous because i'm going to be outside of my routine. I'm brining my workout stuff with me and my plan is to get up and workout every day. There is a pool there that appears to be longer for lengths so even if it too hot to run at least I can get some swimming in. Unfortunately I will have limited control over the food that is served so I will have to be extremely careful what I put in my body. we'll go to Wall Mart once we get there and pick up some healthy snack foods (ie. fruit/nuts/oatmeal for the room). All I can do is stay focused when i'm there and not get off track.

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is.”

Monday, October 11, 2010

It's a lifestyle not a diet

I get asked all the time how my "diet" is going, or how long do I plan on sticking to this "diet". My response, I'm not on a diet. I have changed my lifestyle and am living a healthy, non destructive life that I will continue with forever.

If you think of a diet it is something you will do until you reach your goal, but then once you're at your goal what happens? You go right back into the same patterns that got you to that undesirable weight. Clean eating is the only lifestyle change that I have made since starting my weight loss journey in 2008 that I can honestly say I can sustain for the rest of my life. It surprises me when people don't see it the same way, but I have to remind myself that i'm not here to change anyones perceptions on food/life. I am on my own journey and if they want to join me then I am more than willing to give any information I can but I will not stop my progress just to wait for someone else.

I can honestly say that for the most part those cravings are gone and the emotional urges to use food as a crutch have subsided. They are still there, and I think they always be, but I have learned tools to work around it. Working out has replaced gorging on food for me. If i'm so stressed out I can go for a walk and cool my head.

I'm definitely not perfect in my clean eating lifestyle, I still fall sometimes, I still eat things that aren't necessarily considered "clean" but I know how to stop myself and get back on track. I know not to beat myself up for it and to move on. I'm not really sure where this shift in my mentality came, but I guess practice makes perfect and I never ever ever want to be that person I was before this journey.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

A detour in my workouts

Well I thought I was back full force into the workouts but then that got interrupted. I am embarrassed to say I haven't been looking after myself or making myself a priority for a long time. Taking back control of my health and fitness was step one but there are other aspects of my health that I had been ignoring. I had not gone to the dentist in a number of years because I was terrified of what I would have to do. I knew they were going to tell me I had to get my wisdom teeth out and that totally freaks me out so I just avoided it. Well lets just say I decided it was time to stop procrastinating and that I am in control of my life and that I need to make myself a priority. I went to the dentist and yes they did tell me I have to get my wisdom teeth out. I also had to get 3 fillings. The plan was to go one day for the fillings and then another for all four wisdom teeth. On Friday when I went for the fillings they suggested I get one of the teeth pulled as they had already froze me. I said sure and went along with it. Anyway, my body did not react too well to the freezing so its probably best I did get that one tooth out since I wont have to get freezing on that side again. But it has kinda kept me house bound for the last couple of days since every time I try to get up and do something I feel like i'm going to pass out. I'm going stir crazy!!! I've also been advised to avoid strenuous exercise for a few days to let my gums heal which meant no bootcamp for me this morning :(. I really did miss going and wished I could have been there but i'll be back on Wednesday for sure. My body isn't used to being so stationary for a long period of time so here's hoping that everything heals okay in my mouth and I can get back full force. Well at least for a week and then it's on to Texas where I will have to be super focused because I will have to do it on my own for a week!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

The start of a new 12 week commitment

Never could I have expected when I started Biggest Winners that I would have succeeded. I have a hard time believing in myself, even though I prove to myself every day that I am conquering. I'm not sure why it is so difficult to think positively about my accomplishments. Maybe it's a fear that if I really accept that i'm doing this that I will fail. I just have to keep reminding myself that I'm going to succeed. Every day is a fresh day, every day is a Day One! Regardless if I mess up yesterday I can make it successful today. This card from my fellow Biggest Winners is amazing. I feel so supported with these amazing women who inspire me daily to continue. When I think about sleeping in, instead of waking up for bootcamp, I remind myself of all of them. You ladies are what keep me going and thank you right back at you.

Today was day one of the new Biggest Winners session, there are some returning faces and some new ones. I'm so excited to push myself to limits i've never pushed myself to before. Today we did fitness tests. Part of the fitness test was to run as far as we could for 20 mins on the songhees, get a marker and run back. we will do the same test again in 12 weeks. I got all the way to the tennis courts which I was surprised with. I also pushed myself super hard to keep running and not stop. On my 20 min run back to the studio I only stopped 4 times to walk, and on the walk break I only stopped for 20 seconds. I tell you I could not have done this 12 weeks ago! I will keep running and keep running and keep running.

On another note - I bought 2 size 14 jeans yesterday for my "goal" pants. At the beginning of last session I was wearing an 18/20. In the middle, I bought a 16 and it was tight but it fit. I couldn't fit into one of the 14's - it buttoned up but did not zip up. The other one I could actually put on and zip up and button up!!! So awesome! I honestly cannot tell you the last time I was a 14, maybe grade 8? Given, they are tight but I know by the end of another 12 weeks I'm going to be in those 14s with no problem.

“The principle is competing against yourself. It’s about self-improvement, about being better than you were the day before.”